Pariah

The electricity of sadness shoots down through your nerves, sprouting roots through your fingers. You begin feeling so confident but the hurt keeps knocking in your head. Your environment and the people in it floods your thinking with their falsehood that you are the outcast and are constantly displayed that way.

I was lied to. No matter what has been said to me or about me, there are no actions that coincide with it. I know my worth and it is difficult to know my worth and humble myself in Grace when the disappointment is glowing red in my face.

In those moments, I kept reminding myself to breathe; to remember who I am in Christ. To know that my path is unique and that what is for me will be for me no matter what. There is nothing that Man can do in this world that can keep me from it. My personal decisions in life can deter me but no other person can. This fueled my spirit and energized my soul.

My eyes were full of tears. I was hoping no one could see through my blank stare and tight smile. I was just trying to get through it. And I did - emotions unnoticed.

Once I removed myself from that environment and the people, the tears flooded my face. I was so sad and hurt. But then I told myself that my future is bright; that this too will pass.

We go through things right? Nothing stays the same. So I pulled my hair back into a ponytail, wiped my face and wrote to you, friend. Nothing you go through is unnoticed. You are not alone and through trials like this, you will overcome. You are powerful in who you are and demanding in what you can do. I stand with you.